Difference between revisions of "Jimmy Bones"

Hey, My Name is Jimmy.. Jimmy Bones. Ya didn't ask but ya were standin' there staring at me with a quizzical look on yer face. At least I think it's quizzical.. it may be constipation. Anyways.. since ya are there why don't I give ya the heads up?

I am.. well I guess was a Travel Agent in Land of the Dead. Decent Job. Good Perks. Weekends Off. My own Scythe. Not to be sniffed at. Hey. Stop Sniffing. Right where was I? Oh yeah. So I got it made, guiding the recently departed to the Ninth Underworld. Yeah Right! Who am I kidding? Yer right, job is boring as hell and the 'customers'; well less said about them the better!

So anyways the one thing i have to look forward to each year is the Day of the Dead, when we hard working souls are allowed to visit our families in the Land of the Living. Except this one year my boss, in his infinite wisdom, says to me I have to work cos there is some 'special' new soul arriving.

Well I was having none of that, which I told the boss after he had closed his office door behind me. Time for me to take a sabbatical I thinks. So come the Day of the Dead, I calls in sick and head for Detroit to see how the family are doing only to find some so and so has gone and blown it up.

Hey. Hey. Come Back. I ain't finished! Oh it's on now! I'm the Grim Reaper, Lardass, and you're my next customer.

Favourite Phrases:

You can't hide from the Grim Reaper. Especially when he's got a gun.

My scythe.. I like to keep it close to where my heart used to be.

As a rule, I never touch anything more sophisticated and delicate than myself.

It's amazing how a little touch of human remains can brighten up a place.